LAKEWISE

Recess and gym class are important parts of the school day. They give students a chance to move, have fun, build friendships, practice teamwork, and return to the classroom refreshed. However, when competition becomes too intense, a game that began as fun can quickly lead to arguments, hurt feelings, or ongoing tension that follows students back into the classroom and disrupts learning.

At Our Lady of the Lake School, we want our students to understand that being competitive is not necessarily a bad thing. Competition can teach perseverance, teamwork, confidence, and how to work toward a goal. The challenge is learning how to compete with respect, manage disappointment, and remember that a game should never come at the expense of someone else’s feelings or sense of belonging.

What We Are Reinforcing at OLL

During recess, gym, and other group activities, our faculty and staff regularly remind students to:

• Follow the rules and accept decisions respectfully.
• Include others and make sure everyone has an opportunity to participate.
• Use encouraging words instead of teasing, blaming, or arguing.
• Handle winning with humility and losing with grace.
• Pause and calm down when emotions begin to take over.
• Resolve disagreements appropriately and seek help from an adult when needed.
• Leave the game behind when it is time to return to class.

When situations arise, we help students reflect on what happened, understand how their actions affected others, and consider what they can do differently next time. Our goal is not simply to stop an argument in the moment, but to help students develop the self-control and conflict-resolution skills they will need throughout their lives.

How Families Can Help at Home

Families play an important role in helping children develop healthy attitudes toward competition. Conversations at home can reinforce the same expectations we have at school.

Focus on effort, not only the outcome

Practice winning and losing gracefully

Children need to learn that both winning and losing are normal. Encourage simple responses such as “Good game,” “Nice job,” or “Maybe next time.” Remind them that bragging after a win or blaming others after a loss can take the fun out of the game for everyone.

Help children recognize when they need a break

Talk with your child about how their body feels when they become frustrated or overly excited. A racing heart, raised voice, clenched fists, or the urge to argue may be signs that it is time to pause, take a breath, get a drink of water, or step away briefly.

Encourage children to solve small conflicts calmly

Before stepping in to solve every disagreement, help your child practice respectful phrases such as:

• “I didn’t like when that happened.”
• “Can we start over?”
• “Let’s check the rules.”
• “I need a minute to calm down.”
• “Can an adult help us figure this out?”
• Avoid keeping the conflict going

It is important for children to talk about situations that upset them. At the same time, repeatedly revisiting who was “right” or “wrong” can sometimes keep the anger alive. After listening and acknowledging your child’s feelings, help them focus on what they can control, how the problem can be repaired, and how they can move forward the next day.

Model respectful competition

Children learn a great deal by watching adults. Whether we are playing a family game, watching a sporting event, or discussing a disagreement, we can show them how to manage frustration, respect others, and maintain perspective.

Playing With Purpose

As a Catholic school community, we are called to treat one another with kindness, dignity, patience, and respect, even in the middle of a close game. Good sportsmanship does not mean students cannot play hard, feel excited, or want to win. It means knowing that people are always more important than points.

With consistent guidance from both school and home, our students can learn to enjoy competition without allowing it to damage friendships or interfere with learning. Together, we can help them become strong competitors, supportive teammates, gracious winners, and resilient learners.

Let’s encourage our Lakers to play hard, play fair, and, most importantly, play kind.